Room 529, Thursday Midday

[weetuskenraider]

As decidedly less than thrilled Tahiri had been about the fact that someone had been able to pick up on her little mental friend so easily, Karla had offered her help. Riina had been pretty quiet lately -- but Tahiri didn't feel like counting on that to last. Although she wasn't holding out too much hope yet that there was actually a chance the girl she'd only just met a few days ago could do something about this problem, it definitely couldn't hurt to find out.

So with Hurley out for a few hours she'd handwavily given Karla a call, then took a seat on her bed to try and meditate for a little while. Talking about that particular experience was always unnerving, and just thinking about it now already had her on edge. Ergo, meditating. Or trying, anyway.

[OOC: Post is for peoples what know who they are, up whoa early for great SP justice and roomie modded with permission. Note to self, in case you forget because you are a flake, details of convo with Karla NFB like whoa, please. Notice for triggeriness: the thread with Karla will concern not-exactly-vague memories of torture, so consider that a heads-up.]

Comments

[weetuskenraider]

Tahiri laughed softly. "I'll take it."

[glacial_queen]

"See? Useful already," Karla grinned. "...How are you doing?"

[weetuskenraider]

"I'm not going to want to spend the next few months curled up in a ball crying." Tahiri picked out a chocolate croissant and turned it over in her hands before taking a bite. "I did that, when it happened."

[glacial_queen]

"This is my shocked and surprised face," Karla deadpanned. "..If you hadn't, that would probably have been an indicator of even worse trauma. That you'd just...shut down. That's dangerous."

[weetuskenraider]

"I would have, after Anakin died," Tahiri mused; she had a vague recollection of lying next to his body in the hold of the Ksstarr, talking to him on the escape from Myrkr. "But that's when I was sent here."

[glacial_queen]

"How long has it been?" Karla asked quietly. If there was one thing she understood, it was the death of a loved one.

[weetuskenraider]

Tahiri took a bite of the croissant, trying to get herself composed. "Almost a year now. More or less; time passes strangely between here and home."

[glacial_queen]

"A year for you, regardless of the time passed elsewhere?" Karla probed. "Still pretty raw and recent then, yes? Healing's begun, of course," her relationship with Ben suggested that, "but nowhere close to being healed."

[weetuskenraider]

"Almost, and yes." Tahiri started picking at the croissant. "And yes. I wish it would heal faster, and at the same time I don't want it to."

[glacial_queen]

"I know what you mean." Karla's new pastry was intensely fascinating. "My parents died--were murdered, actually--six years ago. On the one hand, I get so frustrated and annoyed with myself when I'm suddenly reminded of them and I nearly cry. On the other hand, when I can think of them calmly, or I do something that used to make me cry and now doesn't, I wonder if I'm being...unfaithful to their memory. They were my parents. Shouldn't I mourn them forever or something? Am I truly such an ungrateful daughter?"

She slanted a look Tahiri's way. "Sound familiar, huh?"

[weetuskenraider]

"Definitely." Tahiri smiled tentatively at her. "I don't want to hurt forever, but I'm afraid if I let go I might forget. Or care less."

[glacial_queen]

"Yeah," Karla sighed. "I know that. And most days I understand that moving on and growing as a person doesn't mean any of those things I fear. And is exactly what my parents would want me to do. But there are still days when I forget that and worry. I don't think those days will ever go away completely; they just occur less frequently." She smiled. "And sometimes, those are even good days, because I realize that it means that I haven't gotten or stopped caring."

[weetuskenraider]

"I don't think I ever will." Tahiri's smile came a little more easily this time. "It would be worse if I did stop, I think. There's just . . ."

She set the croissant down and held her hands out in front of her, staring at them for a moment before lacing her fingers together slowly. "I'm not quite sure how to make everything fit together just right, yet."

[glacial_queen]

"It just takes time," Karla said, reaching over to pat Tahiri's shoulder. "But integrating Riina will be a big step."

Finishing up her second (third?) pastry, Karla asked, "Does Ben usually get dragged off by his grandfather after they practice?"

[weetuskenraider]

Tahiri had half expected to bristle at the contact, but a little more tension bled off instead . . . although a concerned look crossed her face at the question.

"Sometimes," she allowed. "I think, anyway."

[glacial_queen]

"Okay," Karla said, frowning. "I'm trying to decide if I should go before Ben gets here or not. He...didn't seem thrilled about going off with Master Skywalker. I just don't know if this is a 'I just don't want to talk to my grandfather' thing, or a 'we have important Jedi things to discuss.'"

[weetuskenraider]

"He usually doesn't," Tahiri said with a slight smile. "You know how they go at it with lightsabers? I think it's like that without them, too."

[glacial_queen]

"How warm and fuzzy," Karla muttered with a grin. "Would you like more wine?"

[weetuskenraider]

"I think I'm okay," Tahiri assured her. "As I've discovered, my tolerance is awful."